Wednesday, September 3, 2008

This is one article that I read from Malaysia-today that i found very hilarious. Meaning to post it at my blog since last month but haven't got the chance.. since that i can now access Malaysia -today, might as well do it immediately before it got block again.. ENJOY READING GUYS..

Is there something troubling you? Do you have problem you would like to discuss? Are you undecided about a certain matter and would like an opinion on what to do? Or do you just want to pour out your problems and share it with us. Then write to ‘Dear Pete’ and let us help you.


NO HOLDS BARRED

Raja Petra Kamarudin

Dear Pete,

I am engaged to this young man and we will be getting married next year. However, I am unsure of him and suspect he may be unfaithful to me. You see, I think he is gay as I have caught him ‘making eyes’ with other men many times and I read somewhere that gay man are promiscuous. Furthermore, homosexuality is prohibited in my religion, Islam, so this may create problems with my parents, who are very staunch Muslims. What should I do?

Yati

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Dear Yati,

First of all, you must not think that all gay men are promiscuous. Some are actually very faithful and have remained with the same partner for many years. But then you only suspect that your fiancĂ© may be gay because, as you said, you caught him ‘making eyes’ with other men. It could be that he is just a friendly sort of person, that’s all.

Anyway, why not lay the matter to rest by getting him to swear on the Quran in a mosque that he is not gay. This is now the trend adopted by the government to dispel any accusations that one is gay.

Pete

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Dear Pete,

I am an Indian by birth and have tried for so long to pass myself off as Malay. But my friends still call me ‘Mamak’ and this really upsets me. I am half-Muslim and half-Hindu and I have made this clear many times. Mamaks are pure Muslims so this label certainly does not apply to me, who am half-Muslim and half-Hindu. What should I do? Do you think suing all those who call me ‘Mamak’ will help? I am filthy rich and possess the right connections and can choose the judge who will hear my case; so I will surely win all my cases.

Son of Abdullah

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Dear Son of Abdullah,

First of all, you can’t go around suing all your friends who call you ‘Mamak’ or else you will have no friends left. You can, however, sue all your enemies who call you ‘Mamak’. But then, if your enemies run into millions, you may end up being ‘locked up’ in court for the rest of your life.

One option would be to change your name, in particular the ‘Son of Abdullah’ part. You can legally do this by obtaining a change-of-name certificate from the National Registration Department.

In fact, you can even add a Tunku, Raja or Tengku to your name. And your name should be changed to something very Malay sounding, such as Embong, Jusoh, etc. How does Tengku Embong Bin Tengku Jusoh sound like? This is not only very Malay but will also give you a ‘royal’ touch as well.

Pete

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Dear Pete,

I am a Hindu who is about to marry a Malay girl. My future parents-in-law insist that I must first convert to Islam but I am worried that, when I die, there may be a tug-of-war between my family and my wife’s family as to where I should be buried. What should I do? Should I convert to Islam or forget about marrying this Malay girl?

Rajadurai a/l Rajalingam

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Dear Rajadurai,

If you really love this Malay girl then carry on and marry her, even if you are forced to convert to Islam. You must remember; love is blind; which, therefore, can help you overcome any trial and tribulation. So you must be prepared to face whatever comes for the sake of love.

Anyway, what do you care what happens to your body after you have died? It is not like you will know where you are buried since you are already dead. And look at it on the bright side. Once you convert you will no longer be known as Rajadurai a/l Rajalingam. You can request that your new Muslim name be changed to ‘Raja Durai Bin Raja Lingam’ and then everyone will have to address you as ‘Tengku’. You will then be entitled to buy Amanah Saham shares and Malay Reservation land -- plus you can also become an Umno member and do a post-graduate course in UiTM, amongst some of the other benefits.

Who knows, you might even become the next Prime Minister, as Indians of the Islamic faith appear to have the best chance of becoming Prime Minister. And, no, you don’t need to change your name to ‘Bin Abdullah’. This is not what Islam stipulates and you can insist that they retain your original name, but with some modifications as I suggested above.

Pete

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Dear Pete,

I started my business about ten years ago but can’t seem to make it in the business world. My financial problems have strained my marriage and my wife has asked for a divorce. I am contemplating closing down my business and instead go work for a Chinese towkay who has indicated he is prepared to give me a job. But I do not want to be remembered as a failure and my Malay pride forces me to plod on against all hope even though I know it is futile to continue along this dead end road. Furthermore, why should I go work for a Chinese towkay when it is these Chinese who are robbing us Malays of our rights? What should I do?

Melayu Baru

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Dear Melayu Baru,

You should bury your Malay pride and do what is right for your family, even if it means closing down your business and going to work for a Chinese towkay. Your family should come first. I know it is demeaning to work for the same Chinese who are robbing us Malays of our rights. But let’s face it, 90% of the economy is controlled by the Chinese and, as the previous Prime Minister said, they also pay 90% of the taxes. So we Malays have really no choice but to tompang with the Chinese. That is the reality of the situation.

Pete

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Dear Pete,

I am about to enter university and am undecided whether to take Business Administration or Political Science. My friends advice me to take Business Administration because, they say, I can make more money in the business world. What do you advice?

UiTM New Intake

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Dear UiTM New Intake,

I would advice you take Political Science as you certainly can make more money in politics than in business. The business world is very competitive and there are more failures than success stories. Once you make it politics, you can enjoy 30% shares in Chinese companies plus Chairmanships thrown in. And these shares are all free. You need not pay for them. And, later, when you sell these shares, you get to keep the money.

Pete

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Dear Pete,

I am a 56-year old Malay businessman who is about to marry a 26-year old singer. I am considering going for Botox treatment to make my face look younger but was told that it is haram for Muslims. What is your advice?

Sugar Daddy

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Dear Sugar Daddy,

You can consider eating plenty of tempe because an ex-Chief Minister did just that and he now looks much younger. But I don’t know how much tempe you need to eat and for how long before you get to see the positive affects. One setback with eating too much tempe is that it will give you plenty of wind, so you will have to be very careful with crowded lifts.

Anyway, you should not worry too much whether Botox is haram or not considering that you are a businessman. Surely you indulge in haram activities everyday and Botox would be way at the bottom of the long list of harams.

Pete

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Dear Pete

I am running a bar-disco and have installed 20 slot machines, which is the main money-spinner for my bar-disco. The slot machines can bring me about RM1 million a month. However, while I have a licence to operate my bar-disco, I do not have a licence for the 20 slot machines and now the police want me to pay them RM50,000 a month as protection money or else they will confiscate my slot machines and probably also close down my bar-disco. Bribery is haram in Islam and I am not sure whether I should pay the police the RM50,000 a month they are asking for or should I instead remove the 20 slot machines? I want to avoid doing something that Islam forbids. What is your advice?

Islam Jati

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Dear Islam Jati,

Bribery is prohibited in Islam so I urge you to not pay the RM50,000 a month to the police even though your slot machines are bringing in RM1 million a month. Remove the slot machines and just operate your bar-disco, which has a licence. That would be the proper Islamic thing to do.

Pete

Friday, August 29, 2008

MERDEKAKAH KITA...??

Esok dah 31 August, HARI KEMERDEKAAN YANG KE 51 MALAYSIA. Adakah kita menganggap hari merdeka sebagai satu hari kita boleh bangun lewat, CUTI!! hari ada bunga api malamnya, boleh lepak-lepak kat dataran merdeka, tengok konsert free, tengok perarakan kereta tank, jet dan payung terjun..? Is that the meaning of MERDEKA..
Negara kita telah dijajah oleh kuasa asing bermula dengan Belanda, Jepun dan Inggeris hinggalah kita mendapat kemerdekaan dari Inggeris pada tahun 1957. Tetapi, adakah kita masih lagi merdeka dalam erti kata yang sebenarnya..? Jika tidak adakah kita mengharapkan satu turnaround point yang akan memberi kita makna 'kemerdekaan' itu.. SELAMAT MEMERDEKAKAN DIRI ANDA!!


Wednesday, August 27, 2008

In Penang.. not much to say about it..



Latest pic taken on the way back to Penang and in Penang Island itself.. very tiring. If God willing, plan to go to Tioman Island or maybe to highlands by end of the year.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Anwar Ibrahim won Permatang Pauh Election



Today 26 August 2008, Anwar Ibrahim (PKR) won the election at Permatang Pauh. He won the majority of 15,671 votes against Arif Shah (BN). The official results are as follows..

Anwar Ibrahim - 31,195
Arif Shah - 15,524
Hanafi Mamat - 92
majority - 15,671

Now Anwar is one step ahead to Putrajaya and 16 September will soon be realised. Many more hurdles to come and we can rest asure Bee End is right now planning something on Anwar..

However, I'm happy with the results.. wanna see some changes in the government for the better of our nation..

Sunday, July 13, 2008

When an ISA detainee's daughter dies..

Got this article from Chegu's blog.. Am sad reading this article but yet angry with the authorities and the so called bigshot. What goes around will comes around. May ALLAH bless the soul of adik Aina..

Dear YB Syed Hamid Albar
Home Minister




Re: Aina Mardiah Shahrial, 17

You may not know Aina,she is the eldest daughter of Shahrial Sirin, an ISA detainee. On the afternoon of July 2, about 3 pm, she was admitted into Kajang Hospital. The girl was fighting for her life. The family immediately informed authorities at Kamunting, where her father had been detained for the last 7 years.

Somehow,Shahrial was only told of her daughter's illness at 10.30 am the next day, July 3. Aina's mother made a personal appeal to the authorities at Kamunting to let her daughter be with the dad for the last time. The doctors said Aina had only a few hours of life left, God-willing.

The authorities at Kamunting said they could not release Shahrial. They had to get your signature on the release papers. Yes, YB, your precious signature.

Aina's father was finally released at 5pm. It was the longest four-hour journey to Kuala Lumpur.

Shahrial got to her daughter's side at 9.45 pm. He was too late. Aina had passed away at 6.20pm without seeing her father.

Thank you, YB, and may Allah bless you and your family.



pic: A father's belated good-bye


Norlaila Othman, a wife of an ISA detainee herself (read here), told me that the Abolish ISA Movement will be writing to Syed Hamid so that the Minister knows about the father and daughter. And that besides love, sometimes all we need is a bit of common sense.

Di ambil dari blog amdang81 - seloka orang utara khas untuk pak lah tersayang

Kepada Pak Lah, Perdana Menteri Malaysia Boleh

Hari nie tah hari berapa Pak Lah jadi PM kami
Memang dari dulu kami sokong sampai lani
Tapi hari nie, buka mata, senak perut anak bini......
Tengok Pak Lah habaq minyak naik lagi

Memang kami tak tau pasai ekonomi
Yang tau semua Pak Lah ngan kroni
Tapi sampai bila nak jadi lagu nie
Dapat gaji habis tak berbaki

Pak Lah habag tak boleh buat apa
Nie semua ekonomi dunia
Kalau tak naik nanti dunia kata apa
Habis tu yang rakyat dok menderita, tak pa ka

Dulu Pak Lah kata nak jaga rakyat
Kunun Pak lah nak kerja sama sama dengan rakyat......
Nie dok nampak macam nak telan kederat
Dok nampak kami yang nak melarat

Pak Lah kata masalah rakyat nak ambik berat
Kunun tak mau tengok rakyat hidup melarat
Tapi kalau macam nie punya sarat
Darah rakyat pun boleh sejat

Kerajaan ada kata rakyat manja subsidi
Kunun asyik kerajaan saja dok bagi
Sapa kata kami rakyat tak pernah bagi
Tu...yang lima tahun sekali tu....sapa bagi??

Tiap kali naik harga, dok banding sini sana??
Hampa tengok, kat Thailand lagi mahai dari kita......
Apa jenis depa punya kira
Awat tak ikut pulak Brunai punya harga

Brunai tak leh kira
depa punya minyak berlambak tak terkira
Awat, minyak Malaysia tak dak harga ka?
kalau tidak, tak kan jual minyak kita beli minyak depa

Ada Petronas pun tak leh buat apa
Ada duit sikit, dah nak mengada
Pi buat segala menara pagoda kembaq dua
Nak tunjuk, kami la kaya

Petronas kata kami tak tau apa
Kerajaan yang buat kira bicara
Kami ikut apa depa kata
Royalti jadi ehsan pun kami tak leh kata apa

Kunun dok habag petronas hak rakyat semua
Pakailah minyak petronas, nanti untung dapat kat kita
Nie, nak tanya la....tiap tahun untung beribu juta
Rakyat dapat apa ????? kudis buta....

Hari nie petrol naik, tahan la lagi..
Tengok pulak apa cerita esok pagi
Habis ikan, ayam, cabai sampai ke cili
depa pun sama tumbas naik sekali

Nanti ada la menteri tolong bercakap
Sapa naik harga dia nak pi tangkap
Sampai bila la dia nie nak ubah sikap
Ingat yang dok meniaga kat market tu heran kot dia punya cakap

Pak Lah mau renung nasib kami
Kais hari nie makan untuk kemarin pagi
Anak kecik pun dok ada lagi
Boleh hidup ka kami lagu nie

Dah tak larat nak tanggung cukai
Sini cukai, sana cukai
Dari tanah sampai ke pintu punya ada cukai
Dah sampai masa kot Pak Lah kena guna akai

Jangan dok ingat rakyat macam Pak Lah
Gaji berpuluh ribu hidup tak susah
Ada anak pulak bisnes sebelah sebelah
Dapat tender pun tak payah susah susah

Kami rakyat bukan macam tu
Malah la nie pun dah ada rebus siput kerbau pendek dgan batu
Sedih sungguh ohhhh negara ku
Biar tak merdeka terus pun tak la kalau lagu tu

Dah sampai masa Pak Lah ingat
Selesai masalah rakyat cepat cepat
Nanti kot rakyat naik meluat
satu undi pun Pak Lah tak dapat

Cukup la sampai di sini
Tobat dah...aku tak mengundi BN kali nie
Parti Barang Naik pulak kot jadi depa lani
Kot ada sapa nak Barang Naik lagi undi la depa lagi...


Yang Benar,
Rakyat yang semakin tak larat

*surat ni dijana oleh komputer cap kambing gurun, tiada tanda tangan diperlukan